When I first moved into my new den, I was always starving. You could see my ribs and my fur was all thick where I'd been living on the street. I was used to finding my own food, and I carried on doing that in my new home. In fact, I still do if there is something tasty I want, and no one around to tell me off.

So far, I have eaten...

… half a sack of dried dog food. This is not the actual sack, and actors have been used in this reconstruction, for legal reasons.

No one knew that I had broken into the food bin and eaten til I was full. The only problem was, it was dried food, so when I had a drink, it swelled up to at least twice its original size. So did my stomach. Since no one knew why I was bloated like a balloon (and very uncomfortable), I had to go to the emergency vet. He didn't know what it was, but said I seemed fine in every other way. It was only during the night that Tamsin started to realise the origin of my mystery condition. This was confirmed when she went to give us breakfast and there was hardly any left.

… two green peppers in a sealed pack, on the vegetable rack. Only incriminated by the pile of seeds that I didn't fancy, and of course, the wrapper.

… two packets of Murray Mints. I wasn't greedy though. I got them down from the kitchen counter and shared them with Beanz. We unwrapped them all and saved the wrappers for Tamsin. She was pleased I think, because she picked them all up and put them in her special box under the sink where she puts a lot of our presents for her.

… five days worth of Tamsin's dinner, cooling in the saucepan on the cooker overnight. This was a special achievement because I managed to get the lid off without making a sound. I have also eaten 3 days worth of chick pea curry and 4 days worth of sweetcorn con Elote, on separate occasions. Much tastier than dried dog food, although more harsh on the stomach.

… quarter of a melon. Tamsin had some for lunch and left it on the side. Well, how could I resist? I knocked it onto the floor so Beanz could try it too. And I made beautiful teeth marks round the edge.

Tamsin's friend Julie said that, if Beanz has collie in her, that makes her Melon-collie!! Ha ha ha.

I managed to get a kitchen cupboard door open (it was left ajar) and got 100g of sesame seeds, a bag of plain flour and a packet of mint humbugs.

Beanz helped me tackle a 1kg bag of sugar too.

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This site was constructed and is maintained in memory of Jump the Dog.
If you think that's silly, you haven't lived.
If you know where I'm coming from, I'm smiling for you.

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